Saturday, December 24, 2005 Holiday is a day ...

for relaxing and enjoying with family and friends but today is really not a good day for me. It is Christmas holiday today, but I am over at my mom's place, sitting infront of the pc and not letting my thoughts run wild. I am feeling damn miserable now. I wish I can get out and go for a long walk (cause I don't drive)but DZ is sleeping and once she is awake, I am going back to my own place. I guess I will keep myself busy cleaning the house. I just want the day to go fast so that I will feel better tomorrow ??? I am looking forward to tomorrow as I plan to take DZ out. At least I will be happy seeing her happy.

11:37 PM |2 comments

Tuesday, December 20, 2005 REUNION

My mom's place was noisy with the kids yesterday evening. We all decided to let them meet up after one whole week of isolation. The boys entered the house saying salaam and DZ started smiling and shouting 'Anna Anna'. Each boy requested a kiss from DZ and she gave them hugs and kisses. Next was DFirdaus and DAmiira at the door. They just finished their Mustaffa shopping and DF was carrying a big plastic bag with him. Of course it was his new remote car from Mustaffa shopping center. The boys were excited with the new toy and all of them surrounded my BIL as he was putting the battery inside the car. DAmiira was sleeping at first and I was disturbing her so that she wakes up...I know I am a very bad auntie. She got up and was all smile to see her brothers and sister. On the other hand, DZ was so excited to see DA. She keeps kissing her,touching her face and disturbing the sleeping gal as well...just like her mama :) DA started walking once she got up. DZ ran to hug the gal and I think both the gals lost their balance and fell, with DZ on top of DA. DA was still in her sleepy self :) I carried DZ and DA got up. DZ kept going to DA to hug her. They missed each other alot. It was so fun seeing all the kiddies having a great time. DH and my ma have to miss the fun bec DH was working late and ma went to grandma place. DZ was the one who missed her brothers and sister very much as she was all alone in my mom's place for a week. DA has her brother DF to play with and DMustaqiim, DMubarak and DMuhsin have each others company. DZ has her nani and nana to play with only so she really missed all of them. She kept asking about her Anna(her brothers) and Baby (DA) and boy was she happy yesterday. At the end of the day, one boy was crying. This time it was DF and the one responsible for it was DM. They had a fight as usual. I am so thankful to God that all of them are well and the house is NOISY again :)

8:25 PM |4 comments

Monday, December 19, 2005 taken on Amiira's bday

<photo deleted>
10 12 05

1:32 AM |7 comments

DZoha, DAmiira & DFirdaus

DZoha, DAmiira and DFirdaus had high fever one after another last week. DA had the fever first and then she had blisters on her foot, next was DZ and then DF with the fever and redness in their mouth. The doctor said it was the hand, foot and mouth virus. All 3 of them were ‘separated’ once we found that out. My sister took off from work and she brought her 2 darlings back home and Mommy took care of DZ. I was at work worrying about them but sister assured me that the doctor said it was nothing to be afraid of and make sure the kids are separated and it will be another week or so before they are well to even go out. DA’s fever was down but DZ was having high fever for 3 days and she did not drink her milk at all. She was crying all the time and whenever her fever hits 39 and above, I get all worried. She refused to drink her medicine and whenever I force it down, she throws out all of it. I carried her most of the time when her fever was high and I cried when her body was very hot. I am all weak and break down easily when something happens to DZ or to anyone in my heart. Last Sat morning at 4am, my sister called and said DF was shivering as his fever was very high and he was all pale. My sister and my bil rushed him to KK hospital. After that phone call, I could not sleep at all. I was worrying and was praying his fever goes down. My mom and dad went to fetch DA from the hospital. DZ's fever was back again and she refused to drink her medicine. I called out to my sister in the next room for help. My sister, bil & DF came back to my mom’s place at 6.30am and his fever was down. Now all three of them are fever free and I heard from my elder sis on Sunday morning that the youngest, DMuhsin is having temperature. I was very down the whole of last week.

1:03 AM |5 comments

13 DECEMBER 2005

The flight was delayed. I left home at 10am and reached Changi Airport at 10.45am. I checked from the monitor that PK 898 will arrive at 12.10pm. I was walking around T2 and entered the mini TOON shop. I bought one Elmo bag and bolster for DZ and DA. I was reading the newspaper till 12pm and I was wondering what I will tell DH when I see him. It was 12.25pm when he walked out carrying his luggage. He smiled at me and I smiled back. We took a cab home and in the cab we talked about his family members. Everyone is missing papa and he cried when he talked about papa. He was telling me what happened at home that day when papa passed away (13 12 05):( Everyone back home in Pakistan hope to see us in Jan 06 as I had promised them I will be there with DZ but papa will not be there. I intend to visit his grave when I go there next month, Inshallah.

DZ was so excited to see her papa. She started running about even though she was having temperature. DH carried her and he played with her for awhile. I gave DZ her fever medicine and her papa made her sleep. She called out ‘papa’ even in her sleep. DH realized how much she missed him. She woke up couple of hours later and was looking for her papa. When I asked her, can papa go in the aeroplane? She shook her head left and right and said NO. DH smiled at her reply. We went back home that evening from my mom’s place.

Thank God that DZ’s fever was down but she was feeling tired,sleepy and not her usual self. She played with us for a while and she slept early that night. DH and I sat down and talked about our house, our family members, our bills, our next trip etc. He felt down again when he talked about papa. DH had tears in his eyes and he said he doesn’t have his dad anymore but I reminded him that he himself is a dad now and I know that losing someone in the family can be very painful...it is really painful.

1:00 AM |5 comments

backdated post

When will I ever have a decent conversation with my MIL? I realized that I have not talked to her since the time we were back from Pak. Not that I don’t get along well with her or she hates me, in fact she likes me a lot but the only problem is our language barrier. But now that DH is over there, I will call home and sometimes ammi answers the phone. The day when he left for pak, with the few words I know, I called home to ask if DH has reached. Ammi answered and she replied to me saying that the flight was delayed but he was on his way home from the airport. I understood that much in urdu. I told her ‘ok ammi, thanks’, but she was expecting me to say few words more which I know not and my SIL came on the phone and explain to me everything again in English, geesh . It was different when I was there. I can understand what she was telling me mostly because I ‘watched’ her body language and the topic we were discussing. I will nod my head or have my DH beside me as my interpreter. Somehow I always feel embarrass or helpless when I am on the phone with her. DH as usual pushes the phone to me and say ‘here talk to ammi’ without giving me time to prepare my speech :-) all that I can talk is to ask her how is she in urdu and reply ‘mey theek hoon ammi’. She continues to ask me more questions but I will be lost somehow because I usually try to pick up words that I understand from her questions and assume that is what she is asking. Sometimes I take a longer time to understand her questions. Even if I understand her questions, I can’t reply her back because I can’t seem to find the right words and that’s because I have not been practicing my urdu words at all. I feel like a loser. I was so enthusiastic in learning urdu and that was how I came up with my own materials plus the translation with the help of DH. I studied the materials couple of times and that’s it. It is lying inside my drawer now. I even promised everyone back home that I will learn urdu before my next trip and I will converse with them in urdu and not in English. At the rate I am learning, I will have to continue using the universal language. Yesterday I talked with ammi and at first I was confident in talking to her those few sentences in urdu and I even told her DZ was sleeping in urdu. Until that point I felt I was doing ok. When she asked me more questions, I stumbled for the replies and DH had to come to my rescue as ammi gave him the phone. After yesterday, I have decided to learn few words each day.

12:58 AM |3 comments

Thursday, December 15, 2005 God decides otherwise

When I thought I can enjoy the year end with happy memories, God decides otherwise...The MIGHTY & THE ALL-KNOWING, HE is the one to whom all hearts submit in love & HE is the one whom we turn to when we are happy or sad.

8:17 PM |2 comments

Thursday, December 08, 2005

You're the color blue. You have the three c's in
life--you're cool, caring and confident.
Trustworthy and honest, people are naturally
attracted to you. You're unusually optimistic,
but that makes life all the better. You're an
imaginative person who loves sleeping and
dreaming. Hard-working and determined, you
excell in school. You're everybody's favorite,
and this is because you have this undefined
richness in your personality and attitude.
Mild-tempered and stable. Not to mention very
intelligent. Along with the fact that you're
conservative, you're worried about the
environment. So basically, you're a generous,
dependable and devoted--just the kind of person
everybody needs. Wouldn't it be great if
everybody in the world were like you?


What color are you? (Amazingly detailed & accurate--with pics!)
brought to you by Quizilla

I love DREAMING :D

11:19 PM |3 comments

Wednesday, December 07, 2005 BYE to the year 2005

It is time to think back the moments of my life in the year 2005. I am so thankful to God to let me be around with my family and my friends. Some events that I will remember most are: my 1st trip to Karachi on 23.04.05:my darling zoha turned 1 year old on 06.06.05: my 2nd wedding anniversary on 05.07.05:DZ’s first tooth appearance on 01.09.05: my first DnD together with DH on 10.09.05: my darling amirra turning 1 year old on 11.12.05.
I am sure I missed out few dates like the first time I went with DH for my company’s movie night-out where we watched the movie 'Just Like Heaven', DZ’s first visit to the zoo, DZ’ first time catching the fireworks live on National Day, DZ’s and DA’s baby contest, the birth of my cousin’s first boy in the family after 4 girls. I am really thankful to God to make this year a good year for me as well as for my family and friends. We are so glad to have spent this year with lots of love and sweet memories. I am definitely looking forward to the year 2006 firstly because of my leave entitlement hahaha so that I can apply leave to fly to Karachi and spend sometime with my family there. I am planning to send DZ to the playgroup as well so that she can learn more and enjoy with children of her age. Am I ready to have another one? : D INSHALLAH. (I am sure spicy Harp got something to add on) hahaha. I got couple more dreams for next year. All this will only happen if God wants it to be. For now, let me enjoy my year end bonus and the Christmas and New Year holidays with my family and friends.

I am also waiting for DH to be back from Pakistan. Missing him ‘loads and loads’.

12:34 AM |15 comments

Sunday, December 04, 2005 A bus journey with a pervert

This morning I took bus 124 to work. After few stops from my mom's place, this old man board the bus and he sat beside me. If I am in the bus and if there are any empty seats beside old men, I will prefer to stand than sit beside them. At first, when the old man sat beside me, I was sitting near to the window. I was watching news on tv mobile, when suddenly I felt someone's hand on my leg. This dirty old man moved his hand and leg nearer to me and he pretended to be sleeping. I quickly took my bag and place near my side. I pushed his hand away from my side with my bag...I press my bag on his hand and leg away from me. I kept staring at him. He pretended to not see me with his small eyes. I felt like giving him one big punch on his face. But I did not want to make a scene. He did not stop there. He started moving his elbow towards me. I was really very angry by then. I gave him one hard push with my elbow. The bus was very crowded this morning. There was a lady standing on his right side. This dirty old man tried his trick on her. She looked at him and then she looked at me. I just looked at her for sometimes and she understood from my eyes that that this guy is a sick old man. She moved away from him. Another lady came and he continued his way. She placed her bag infront of her so that he will not touch her. She moved away too. It was confirmed that this old man is a pervert after seeing the two ladies moved away. I got up from my seat and stand away from the old man. Unfortunately, another lady sat on the seat. I was watching him all the while. He did it again with his elbow. The lady stared at him. By now, the bus has reached my stop. Before I got down the bus, I advised the lady not to sit beside the dirty old man. She agreed with me. I said it very loud that he is one sick man who deserved to be handed over to the police. Everyone in the bus heard me and I got down after that. The old man did not even dare to look at me...It was just my bad luck this morning. There will be no next time. I am not going to sit beside any old man ever again.

6:07 PM |6 comments

Day 2: Feeling lonely

DH called and he is doing fine. I am glad he is spending time with ammi and papa. Everyone back home is missing us. I am online waiting for DH to come. He said he will be online. I have been staying over at my mom's place since yesterday. I am missing my own home. Tomorrow I plan to go back to my place after work and do some cleaning up. DZ pushing me out of the chair saying she wants to use the j njkggjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjg, jj ok shehe took over the keyboard...g,,,x she is fighting with me over the keyboard and saying "wait wait" and pushing my hand away from the keyboard. Papa see I am typing :) There she comes again..saying "sit sit"

3:26 AM |4 comments

Saturday, December 03, 2005 Day 1: A feeling of Anxiety

DH took the PIA flight to Karachi today.

Updated: DH reached home safely, ALHAMDULILAH. (feeling light hearted now). We are missing you alot.

9:23 AM |0 comments